Divorce is hugely impactful to children. I will identify some of the principle themes of divorce trauma. The homeopathic remedy suited to the child in need of each is also given.
Today’s blog elaborates on themes drawn from my books, one that interprets a condition from a homeopathic perspective: Interpreting Chronic Illness and the other providing a homeopathic context for relationship trauma: Toxic Relationship Cure.
Thuja The only reason you came together was to have me!
For such children divorce indicates that no reason exists for them to have been born. The self–esteem of such a child plummets as she seeks to become anyone other than her non-acceptable self. She is ashamed and ashamed of being ashamed. This translates into the inauthenticity of chameleon like behavior, mental gymnastics and obsessiveness. Unable to access her self-interest she is prone to bad decision-making.
Nat Sulph I just don’t count for anything!
Once a Thuja layer has been peeled away a more authentic but grief-laden level bubbles up from within the psyche. If it’s a Nat Sulph, remedy state the child is prone to depression with a tendency to feel his opinions and feelings are constantly being dismissed.
Lachesis I cannot bottle up my grief!
The Lachesis child is emotionally intense, full f rage and grief she is constrained from fully expressing. Her feelings vent in manipulativeness, loquacity, flamboyance, seductiveness, but also with asthma and sleep disturbance.
Manganum Nothing I do is right!
Bad enough that the parents are divorcing but when one or the other is also domineering the fretful situation of a Manganum remedy state can arise.
As with Lachesis the problem is suppression of emotions. Only here confidence is undermined. Bitterness, withdrawal and a sense that one’s every word and action must be questioned results.
Mag Carb and Mag Mur Your fighting with one another means you don’t love me!
Divorce can terrify a child into thinking that her relationship is doomed. Equating anger or aggression with the withdrawal of love she becomes a peacemaker at all costs. When relational insecurity to the father is stronger the remedy is Mag Carb. When the child’s insecurity is primarily about the relationship with her mother then the remedy is Mag Mur.
Ammon Carb and Ammon Mur You won’t get anything out of me!
In the aftermath of a divorce it is common for a child to blame one of the parents, more often the nearby as opposed to the geographically distant parent. Unaware of the actual source of his anger the child is insulting to his parent, full of attitude, sour and impossible to please. If directly confronted with his behavior the child clams up giving away nothing as if to say, “You won’t get anything out of me!” When the bitterness is directed toward the dad the remedy is Ammon Carb. When its target is the mother the remedy is Ammon Mur.
As they never quite manage to say in the TV commercials, if you are concerned about the impact of divorce on a child talk, to your homeopath!